There is another side to a business that others never see… the work that goes on behind the scenes. This work, behind the veil, is the foundation to the show. The people exhausted from hours on the job. The staff covered in oil trying to get the equipment to run, those responding to the never ending social media contacts, those putting out fires, running errands, doing the book keeping, bills, sales tax payments, government compliance requirements, sweating for hours in the sun….. The people behind the curtain don’t always get recognized or seen. In fact, if they are doing their job right, they are never seen. Why do I say all this?
Because I’ve come to learn over the last year at my new job that it is not possible to please everyone. There will always be a scenario where someone is displeased with an action your company took or you yourself initiated. It’s important to understand attention/appreciation cannot be the reason someone works hard for a business. If it is, the business doors would shut pretty fast. I am writing this blog, because I find this subject interesting as appreciation is the deepest need of our egos (some argue even more than love). Most seek that appreciation from outside. I feel strongly that is a mistake and the cause of great suffering. John Groberg writes an interesting article about ego: Our Ego’s Deepest Need: Appreciation
“The Spirit doesn’t need appreciation, love, acceptance or validation. It doesn’t need anything. It already is all those things and more. The Ego, however, does crave, need and desire all those things. It ultimately can only really receive the love and appreciation it desires from the Spirit who has it to give in abundance. But the Ego looks for love in all the wrong places. Any place besides the Spirit is the wrong place. It looks for it in others- first parents, then friends, then spouses, then children, then the world at large. Always seeking outside what can only truly be found inside. ‘Ever seeking and never coming to a knowledge of the truth”‘ (John Groberg).
Most who don’t feel appreciation leave the situation they are in to find appreciation. Often that requires people to leave a comfortable relationship, job, or living situation. But is that the right move to get the ego’s attention? Every scenario is different but I feel it is generally not the right move because appreciation must come from within yourself. Seeking this affirmation from outside creates suffering and a battle which cannot be won to satisfy other’s desires for yourself.
All this to say….
- Learn from your mistakes. Accept you are imperfect. Realize your humanity thru your flaws.
- Always listen to feedback from others. Take in the constructive criticism and later respectfully disregard advice you don’t agree with.
- If someone asks you if you know how to do something, always say no so you can learn more.
- Do your best at everything you do. Do it for yourself.
- Set goals and strive for them. But do not become so obsessed with keeping them you lose sight of why you started that journey.
And always remember….. you can’t always please everyone. True peace, the highest level of fulfillment, has to come from within yourself.